When I was 18 and in college I met a man who stole my heart. He was kind and affectionate, handsome and hard working. But he also had a dark side. Something that ended up shaping me to be exactly who I was supposed to be. He had a drinking problem and when he would drink hard alcohol he would turn into a different human. Someone who wasn’t kind or affectionate. Someone who would rip his hand away from mine in disgust and call me a slut for no reason. He would disrespect me, shame me, manipulate me and put me down. And then when the alcohol would wear off he’d return to a beautiful supportive happy loving human who treated me like a queen. He was the first man I loved... I was only 18 when we met and for some reason even though I knew it was wrong and not okay I put up with it. I put up with it for 5 years. 5 years we lived
together in a cute little house in a relationship that was bi-polar.
 
 At the time I offered boudoir sessions but with each one I did I would see the same thing
 happen. Women would come to me shy and scared and throughout the session they
 would grow and evolve. By the end the insecure woman that walked in was a strong
 and courageous woman who was on such a high she wanted to share her images with
 the world. So.. I would post a photo of her and the likes and comments would pour in
 about her raw beauty and magnetic soul. She would be radiating, buzzing on a new
 frequency of love for herself but then... her partner would see the post and jealousy
 would be born. They would have an argument over it and next thing I knew I was getting
a phone call to take it down from my page. The woman would be miserable, defeated
from her journey and back to square one full of shame and sadness and I would never
hear from her again. I was also in this position. Every time I posted something vulnerable or intimate my boyfriend would come at me with gun fire. He’d tear me apart and tell me I was doing it for attention of other men. That I was acting like a whore and needed to keep myself
 private and only for him. But I continued to fight for what I believed in. I continued to push his boundaries and others and fight for my passion. I knew this change needed to happen for the world and knew I was the one that needed to make it happen.
 
So with a fire burning inside of me I decided to set myself free. Free from a man I will
 always have love for but from a man who was suffering from his own insecurities and
 putting them on me. And set out on a new journey of self expression. About a month
 after the relationship ended I woke up in a friend’s bed with the morning light pouring in
 and new what I needed to do. I set my camera up on a tripod and stripped my clothing
 off. I cried as I held myself, but with each frame I could feel myself getting lighter. I
 edited 15 of those images and looked at myself in them. I could feel this power about
 them... but I was nervous. I was SO FUCKING nervous. For years I had been told I
 wasn’t allowed to show my body to the world that I was sexual and that’s all I was. That
 if I posted these I would be a slut wanting attention from other men. But that wasn’t why
 I was doing this. That wasn’t how I felt. I wanted to share these to be raw, to be
 vulnerable to educate the world that skin is skin and that nudity isn’t always sexual.
That nudity can be honesty. Can be strength. Can be self love.
Nudity can be respected and admired.
 
So, I took my laptop home and made my family look at them. I forced my mother and
 father to look at me naked in the photos I’d selected. I waited in complete terror to see
 what they thought. But they were supportive. They were behind me. They didn’t think for
 a second that these images were pornographic or sexual. They trusted me and my
 vision and that is all I could have ever asked for. To have support from my loved ones.
 So I posted them online. Knowing my ex would probably end up seeing them and knowing he would be angry but also knowing that I was free from his judgement. I made a post about how I wanted to start photographing women who wanted to celebrate their bodies for themselves. To get photos done to thank their skin for holding their hearts. And if they chose to share them with their partners they could but the photos would not be taken for anyone but themselves and it would be their choice to share them or not. They were meant to empower. And empower they did.
 It is now what I am known for in the artist world. I am an empowerment artist. A teacher
 of self love and expression. I photograph the good the bad and the ugly. The vulnerable
 and the brave and I will never let another human hold my magic back from this world.
 

MY WHY

MARCH 6, 2022

MY WHY

“we rise, and never worry about the fall. I guess that's the cowboy in us all.“

-unknown
together in a cute little house in a relationship that was bi-polar.
 
 At the time I offered boudoir sessions but with each one I did I would see the same thing
 happen. Women would come to me shy and scared and throughout the session they
 would grow and evolve. By the end the insecure woman that walked in was a strong
 and courageous woman who was on such a high she wanted to share her images with
 the world. So.. I would post a photo of her and the likes and comments would pour in
 about her raw beauty and magnetic soul. She would be radiating, buzzing on a new
 frequency of love for herself but then... her partner would see the post and jealousy
 would be born. They would have an argument over it and next thing I knew I was getting
a phone call to take it down from my page. The woman would be miserable, defeated
from her journey and back to square one full of shame and sadness and I would never
hear from her again. I was also in this position. Every time I posted something vulnerable or intimate my boyfriend would come at me with gun fire. He’d tear me apart and tell me I was doing it for attention of other men. That I was acting like a whore and needed to keep myself
 private and only for him. But I continued to fight for what I believed in. I continued to push his boundaries and others and fight for my passion. I knew this change needed to happen for the world and knew I was the one that needed to make it happen.
 
So with a fire burning inside of me I decided to set myself free. Free from a man I will
 always have love for but from a man who was suffering from his own insecurities and
 putting them on me. And set out on a new journey of self expression. About a month
 after the relationship ended I woke up in a friend’s bed with the morning light pouring in
 and new what I needed to do. I set my camera up on a tripod and stripped my clothing
 off. I cried as I held myself, but with each frame I could feel myself getting lighter. I
 edited 15 of those images and looked at myself in them. I could feel this power about
 them... but I was nervous. I was SO FUCKING nervous. For years I had been told I
 wasn’t allowed to show my body to the world that I was sexual and that’s all I was. That
 if I posted these I would be a slut wanting attention from other men. But that wasn’t why
 I was doing this. That wasn’t how I felt. I wanted to share these to be raw, to be
 vulnerable to educate the world that skin is skin and that nudity isn’t always sexual.
That nudity can be honesty. Can be strength. Can be self love.
Nudity can be respected and admired.
 
So, I took my laptop home and made my family look at them. I forced my mother and
 father to look at me naked in the photos I’d selected. I waited in complete terror to see
 what they thought. But they were supportive. They were behind me. They didn’t think for
 a second that these images were pornographic or sexual. They trusted me and my
 vision and that is all I could have ever asked for. To have support from my loved ones.
 So I posted them online. Knowing my ex would probably end up seeing them and knowing he would be angry but also knowing that I was free from his judgement. I made a post about how I wanted to start photographing women who wanted to celebrate their bodies for themselves. To get photos done to thank their skin for holding their hearts. And if they chose to share them with their partners they could but the photos would not be taken for anyone but themselves and it would be their choice to share them or not. They were meant to empower. And empower they did.
 It is now what I am known for in the artist world. I am an empowerment artist. A teacher
 of self love and expression. I photograph the good the bad and the ugly. The vulnerable
 and the brave and I will never let another human hold my magic back from this world.
 

Maternity Session

april 29, 2022

Cowboy #2

You’ll always find me with a camera in my hand. Lately my Nikon film with a 28mm lens.

I will be adding many of these to my print shop soon!

FILM Session

July 10, 2021

OKANAGAN TO CAMP ON FILM.

“You gotta love like there’s no such thing as a broken heart. “

Old Dominion

COUPLE SESSION

July 10, 2021

BRIT & BRAEDEN

This was the day these two found out they were pregnant. Keeping a little secret to themselves, their joy was infectious.

A day and a shoot they will cherish forever.

Not long after they experienced a miscarriage. I can only image the pain they have been feeling over these last couple weeks. They have been trying so hard to start a family. But this is unfortunately a common story and I have full faith they will be blessed again.

Keep your chins up. You two are going to be the most incredible parents when it’s meant to happen. I love you both deeply. Sending all my love and light.
My favourites are the last ones when the girls had a pretend wedding for them.

COUPLE SESSION

July 10, 2021

LACEY & JORDAN

Let’s begin with a little introduction, just so you know a bit about me. My name is Natalie and I am 23, this is the birth story of my fourth baby, my first daughter after three boys. I had one hospital birth and two home births leading up to this one.

I will be adding many of these to my print shop soon!

FILM Session

DEC 15, 2020

BIRTH OF BIRDIE
DIGITAL

Giving birth was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, physically, mentally and emotionally... but also has given me the worlds greatest gift, my daughter. 
A day and a shoot they will cherish forever.

Not long after they experienced a miscarriage. I can only image the pain they have been feeling over these last couple weeks. They have been trying so hard to start a family. But this is unfortunately a common story and I have full faith they will be blessed again.

Keep your chins up. You two are going to be the most incredible parents when it’s meant to happen. I love you both deeply. Sending all my love and light.
My favourites are the last ones when the girls had a pretend wedding for them.

FAMILY SESSION

July 10, 2021

HELLO AMELIA

This is the place where forest, river and sea meet at the end of the West Coast Road.
The best part? It’s less than two hours from Victoria, BC.
I will be adding many of these to my print shop soon!

FILM Session

December 11, 2020

WILD RENFREW

We talk about falling in love like it only happens once, when you meet and get to know someone. In reality, we can fall in love with the same people over and over.

I have fallen in love with my husband too many times to count. Ten years later, many versions of myself later, and I love him more. More than when we first met, when we travelled, when we had our first child, then our second, then when we were married.

I loved him the moment I met him. I loved him more every time I saw him, and I wanted him more every time I saw him.
Love isn’t what we make it seem to be. Love is the driver. Love rules all. Love isn’t hard, but relationships are. Learning to love a person through all of their stages takes time and commitment.
Our relationship has been dragged through dirt, dusty, and unsettled. Dark and motionless. But the flame never fully went out. The flame was fuelled by our love. Even when we didn’t want to love each other, we did. When we were reunited, there was an explosion of energy. A pull and draw like I had never felt before. We forgot about our past in that moment and were inseparable. We stayed up all night, tangled together, until the sun rose.

That was only the beginning.

As the years of our lives passed, we changed. I changed. I grew. I worried that I was outgrowing my husband. But I just knew we would be fine, because of how truly and purely I love him. We found balance in communication. When he knew of my concern, I saw him immediately open his mind. I am so grateful for his responsiveness.
Now, we make time for each other, we make time for ourselves. We hired a nanny, and we ask grandparents to take the kids overnight every once in a while. We go on spontaneous adventures and make love in random places in nature. We role play, we dance, we laugh so so much. Joy fuels our love.
Falling in love with my husband is my most favourite hobby.

-Hayley + Graeme

A day and a shoot they will cherish forever.

Not long after they experienced a miscarriage. I can only image the pain they have been feeling over these last couple weeks. They have been trying so hard to start a family. But this is unfortunately a common story and I have full faith they will be blessed again.

Keep your chins up. You two are going to be the most incredible parents when it’s meant to happen. I love you both deeply. Sending all my love and light.
My favourites are the last ones when the girls had a pretend wedding for them.

COUPLES SESSION

DEC, 14, 2020

FIRST COMES LOVE THEN COMES...

The most magical intimate wedding on the shore of Kalamalka Lake.

The rain got so heavy during their ceremony; showering them with love. 

“Our story is beautiful but also rather muddy.... 
it’s a story of trusting intuition and listening to the guidances of the universe. It’s a story about faith and struggle and devotion and unwavering commitment to speaking our truth. 
Our love was built in millions of words and thousands of questions shared in writing before we ever spoke on the phone; or met again in person. 
Our love is an old one. One that stretches beyond this life time.”

ELOPEMENT Session

December 11, 2020

AMBER & ROBBIE'S ELOPMEMENT


Still going strong on the FaceTime sessions.

There are places in the heart you don’t even know exist until you love a child.
-Anne Lamott
A day and a shoot they will cherish forever.

Not long after they experienced a miscarriage. I can only image the pain they have been feeling over these last couple weeks. They have been trying so hard to start a family. But this is unfortunately a common story and I have full faith they will be blessed again.

Keep your chins up. You two are going to be the most incredible parents when it’s meant to happen. I love you both deeply. Sending all my love and light.
My favourites are the last ones when the girls had a pretend wedding for them.

FACETIME SESSION

DEC 03, 2021

NATHALIE, SEAN, AND ESME

Talk about full circle… maybe too much info for some hahah but I feel like there’s a power in the bleedI will be adding many of these to my print shop soon!

FILM Session

November 25, 2020

CALEB, COURTNEY, LEO + ZIGGY


MOTHERHOOD GOES LIKE THIS:

You want to speed it up and slow it down. You want them to be grown ups and babies at the same time. The things that drive you insane are the things you know you’ll miss the most. You want a break but you miss them on the break. You want to cry because you are so broken, but you want to happy cry because you’re so whole. you lose yourself and find yourself almost every day. You have no idea what you’re doing, but you know you’re doing exactly what you’re supposed to be doing. It’s just the way it is. So cheers to all the mums in all the phases, with all the feelings. You’re not alone.

-catandnat
There are places in the heart you don’t even know exist until you love a child.
-Anne Lamott
A day and a shoot they will cherish forever.

Not long after they experienced a miscarriage. I can only image the pain they have been feeling over these last couple weeks. They have been trying so hard to start a family. But this is unfortunately a common story and I have full faith they will be blessed again.

Keep your chins up. You two are going to be the most incredible parents when it’s meant to happen. I love you both deeply. Sending all my love and light.
My favourites are the last ones when the girls had a pretend wedding for them.

FACETIME SESSION

NOV 21, 2020

BRI & MOLLY

This wedding was so much fun to be a part of and to get to photograph. Ashley and I grew up together and I spent many days and nights with her and her family growing up. Listening to S Club 7 and giving each other back tickles. I also remember sneaking into her parents room to get Halloween candy from the drawers and sitting in a giant chair; the biggest chair ever snuggled up with her mom crying when I was homesick. Their house was full of talent, someone always playing the piano downstairs out skating outside. There was constant energy with five siblings running around and it was always a place I liked being.

But it had been years since I had seen them all together and only my second time meeting Connor. Who holds the record for the most tears cried by a groom haha. Which I LOVE, takes a real man to be vulnerable and I can tell Connor will be a wonderful partner to Ashley. 

Wish you two all the best for this wild future. 

xx


FILM Session

November 25, 2020

ASHLEY & CONNOR


I want so badly to be able to explain all the love I have for you. Not the love of butterflies and stomach knott, but the blurring of self and the entanglement with another soul, your soul. Love is a word that is much too soft and used far too often to ever describe the fierce, infinite and blazing passion that I have in my heart for you. The word love doesn’t even begin to describe what feelings I have for you.


You want to speed it up and slow it down. You want them to be grown ups and babies at the same time. The things that drive you insane are the things you know you’ll miss the most. You want a break but you miss them on the break. You want to cry because you are so broken, but you want to happy cry because you’re so whole. you lose yourself and find yourself almost every day. You have no idea what you’re doing, but you know you’re doing exactly what you’re supposed to be doing. It’s just the way it is. So cheers to all the mums in all the phases, with all the feelings. You’re not alone.

-catandnat
There are places in the heart you don’t even know exist until you love a child.
-Anne Lamott
A day and a shoot they will cherish forever.

Not long after they experienced a miscarriage. I can only image the pain they have been feeling over these last couple weeks. They have been trying so hard to start a family. But this is unfortunately a common story and I have full faith they will be blessed again.

Keep your chins up. You two are going to be the most incredible parents when it’s meant to happen. I love you both deeply. Sending all my love and light.
My favourites are the last ones when the girls had a pretend wedding for them.

WEDDING SESSION

NOV 21, 2020

KOA & DUFFY SAY I DO

Ziggy Bridges birth through my eyes:
Yesterday on October 18th we welcomed Ziggy Bridges into this world.

I am still in shock over how it all came to be. Back in Feb, Courtney contacted me saying she just found out she was pregnant and wanted to see if I was available for maternity and birth photos. With my wild schedule things don’t always line up but when they do it’s like the stars and the moon work together.

Yesterday morning I was sitting in Kelowna starring out my window looking at the giant snowflakes fall dreading what the highway was going to be like. As I left my driveway my wiper blade stopped working. Two hours later after everyone telling me to not go, to stay, get it fixed on Monday I was back on the road. With a wrench in my console incase I had an issue on the road. I was determined to get to the Island. I wasn’t in a rush I just felt like I NEEDED to be there. I made it across the highway in thick fog, did my session in Van, my ferry was canceled and then not canceled… I was on the 5:45. While I was sitting on the ferry I realized I hadn’t heard back from Courtney. I also though about how strong my cramps were today. Usually having a lite period today was extra odd. My period was heavy and my cramps were strong. My mind on my uterus most of the day. That’s when I though to myself… I wonder if Courtney is in labour?

45 min out of Naniamo I got a text. “I think I’m in labour, the midwife is coming at 8pm to check me.” 5 minutes from the turn off to her house she txt me again “ I’m 4 cm.” Within 30 min I was at her house and in 2.5 hours Ziggy was born. 

Her labour was fast and furious. She nearly had him on the toilet trying not to push while the other midwife rushed to join. She birthed him in the tub but he was almost to big to fit, struggling with the shoulders the midwife had to manually assist. A full 10 lbs! Courtney was so kind throughout her labour. Her love so strong from her partner. Always a please, always a thank you even if it got cut off for a contraction. 

I think this is my favourite part about birth… watching the couple. It’s always such an honour to be part of someones birth. Being in that sacred space, with dimmed lights, moans and cries. Every touch means something. Every little kiss, every word of encouragement. It’s when I see couples real love… I see the want in their partners eyes to be able to take the hurt away. I see the strength they have in each other. It’s beautiful and so fucking real. 

After getting to the bed and things going so smoothly, Courtney began to loose a lot of blood. The paramedics were called and she was carried away on a stretcher to the hospital. Her son who had been sleeping woke up from all the comotion and Caleb quickly and calmly comforted him and distracted him with trucks and a show. Not wanting him to see the mess or his new little brother yet. Not without Mom. Courtney’s friend Krystal who was there for support ( and fucking rad support she gave) was tending to her own infant so I got to hold little Ziggy. 

So fresh, brand new… His first couple hours of life outside his mother and I was holding him… I don’t usually get to snuggle my clients babies when they are so fresh and if I do it’s not for very long. So I swaddled him in a blanket and found a rocking chair in the corner of his brothers room and we looked at each other. I got to feel his soft fresh skin, listen to his perfect little sounds. Watch his eyes open and close as he tried to put the world in focus. I sat there holding him in awe of his perfection. A tear slipped down my cheek, sad for his mother who wasn’t getting to hold him right now. Part of me feeling guilty that I was getting this time with him and not her but knowing it was for her own safety. I don’t think having my period was helping with my emotions but births really fucking get me… Being a woman and watching what our bodies fucking create and birth! We grow humans!! He grew inside of her and now he’s here… it’s wild. 

After 15 min or so everyone was organized, we got in our vehicles. Caleb, bless him… Most guys with new babies are always so awkward hahah they never seem to know how to hold them or what to do with their tiny little bodies and Caleb just powered through. Never skipping a beat, remaining so calm and strong for his family, he took little Ziggy inside. Courtney was waiting for them her bleeding had stopped and Ziggy was ready to eat! Meanwhile myself and Krystal and infant got to hang out with her son in the parking lot and go for walks and look a trucks while we waited for Caleb to come back. At 2 am I hit the road and got home at 3:30 am. Tired. But so happy. 

Birth is fucking amazing you guys… fucking amazing. 


But it had been years since I had seen them all together and only my second time meeting Connor. Who holds the record for the most tears cried by a groom haha. Which I LOVE, takes a real man to be vulnerable and I can tell Connor will be a wonderful partner to Ashley. 

Wish you two all the best for this wild future. 

xx


FILM Session

November 25, 2020

ZIGGY BRIDGES


I want so badly to be able to explain all the love I have for you. Not the love of butterflies and stomach knott, but the blurring of self and the entanglement with another soul, your soul. Love is a word that is much too soft and used far too often to ever describe the fierce, infinite and blazing passion that I have in my heart for you. The word love doesn’t even begin to describe what feelings I have for you.


You want to speed it up and slow it down. You want them to be grown ups and babies at the same time. The things that drive you insane are the things you know you’ll miss the most. You want a break but you miss them on the break. You want to cry because you are so broken, but you want to happy cry because you’re so whole. you lose yourself and find yourself almost every day. You have no idea what you’re doing, but you know you’re doing exactly what you’re supposed to be doing. It’s just the way it is. So cheers to all the mums in all the phases, with all the feelings. You’re not alone.

-catandnat
There are places in the heart you don’t even know exist until you love a child.
-Anne Lamott
A day and a shoot they will cherish forever.

Not long after they experienced a miscarriage. I can only image the pain they have been feeling over these last couple weeks. They have been trying so hard to start a family. But this is unfortunately a common story and I have full faith they will be blessed again.

Keep your chins up. You two are going to be the most incredible parents when it’s meant to happen. I love you both deeply. Sending all my love and light.
My favourites are the last ones when the girls had a pretend wedding for them.

WEDDING SESSION

NOV 21, 2020

ASH, CODY, & RHETT

I stopped shaving about two years ago--I was a senior in high school. I had just gone through an experience where I realized a fellow classmate, someone I thought was a friend and who was in student leadership, had been saying disgusting, verbally aggressive comments about my body. People had heard him saying them, but no one had told me, and I continued to treat him as I would a friend. As soon I heard the details of what he had been saying, I lost the sense of safety in my own skin. I realized everyone had a claim to my body before I did. This came after a year when multiple friends of mine had been sexually assaulted, and I'd struggled with mental health immensely. I felt so gross that I wanted to wear a paper bag on my head, hoping people would no longer see my boobs or butt, but instead, I stopped shaving. At the time, having leg hair was just about the most revolting thing, from a man's perspective, I could come up with to do to my body. I wanted them to see my leg hair before they saw my boobs, hoping that it would make me less sexually appealing to them. 

Reflecting back on that, I realize it was a way for me to try and hide in my own skin. Covering up my body so I could fade into a darkness where no one could hurt me. Since then, I haven't started shaving, but now I do it for different reasons.

I have decided that I want to have complete ownership of my body. Before anyone else. I gave up wearing make-up and eventually stopped wearing bras too. I wanted my body to be as raw and natural as I could get it. I wanted to own who I was, before society constructed what I should be, and fall in love with my physical state. 

I don’t always love my body hair, in fact some days I secretly think I’d look better without out. Or at least hotter. But I guess that’s why I’m so determined not to shave. I want to get to the point where I do feel sexy—all the time. Strutting my stuff with all my glorious body hair. I am fiercely determined to love myself and my body. To claim it as my own, not anyone else's.

-Makenzie (@minalminwaji)

I am still in shock over how it all came to be. Back in Feb, Courtney contacted me saying she just found out she was pregnant and wanted to see if I was available for maternity and birth photos. With my wild schedule things don’t always line up but when they do it’s like the stars and the moon work together.

Yesterday morning I was sitting in Kelowna starring out my window looking at the giant snowflakes fall dreading what the highway was going to be like. As I left my driveway my wiper blade stopped working. Two hours later after everyone telling me to not go, to stay, get it fixed on Monday I was back on the road. With a wrench in my console incase I had an issue on the road. I was determined to get to the Island. I wasn’t in a rush I just felt like I NEEDED to be there. I made it across the highway in thick fog, did my session in Van, my ferry was canceled and then not canceled… I was on the 5:45. While I was sitting on the ferry I realized I hadn’t heard back from Courtney. I also though about how strong my cramps were today. Usually having a lite period today was extra odd. My period was heavy and my cramps were strong. My mind on my uterus most of the day. That’s when I though to myself… I wonder if Courtney is in labour?

45 min out of Naniamo I got a text. “I think I’m in labour, the midwife is coming at 8pm to check me.” 5 minutes from the turn off to her house she txt me again “ I’m 4 cm.” Within 30 min I was at her house and in 2.5 hours Ziggy was born. 

Her labour was fast and furious. She nearly had him on the toilet trying not to push while the other midwife rushed to join. She birthed him in the tub but he was almost to big to fit, struggling with the shoulders the midwife had to manually assist. A full 10 lbs! Courtney was so kind throughout her labour. Her love so strong from her partner. Always a please, always a thank you even if it got cut off for a contraction. 

I think this is my favourite part about birth… watching the couple. It’s always such an honour to be part of someones birth. Being in that sacred space, with dimmed lights, moans and cries. Every touch means something. Every little kiss, every word of encouragement. It’s when I see couples real love… I see the want in their partners eyes to be able to take the hurt away. I see the strength they have in each other. It’s beautiful and so fucking real. 

After getting to the bed and things going so smoothly, Courtney began to loose a lot of blood. The paramedics were called and she was carried away on a stretcher to the hospital. Her son who had been sleeping woke up from all the comotion and Caleb quickly and calmly comforted him and distracted him with trucks and a show. Not wanting him to see the mess or his new little brother yet. Not without Mom. Courtney’s friend Krystal who was there for support ( and fucking rad support she gave) was tending to her own infant so I got to hold little Ziggy. 

So fresh, brand new… His first couple hours of life outside his mother and I was holding him… I don’t usually get to snuggle my clients babies when they are so fresh and if I do it’s not for very long. So I swaddled him in a blanket and found a rocking chair in the corner of his brothers room and we looked at each other. I got to feel his soft fresh skin, listen to his perfect little sounds. Watch his eyes open and close as he tried to put the world in focus. I sat there holding him in awe of his perfection. A tear slipped down my cheek, sad for his mother who wasn’t getting to hold him right now. Part of me feeling guilty that I was getting this time with him and not her but knowing it was for her own safety. I don’t think having my period was helping with my emotions but births really fucking get me… Being a woman and watching what our bodies fucking create and birth! We grow humans!! He grew inside of her and now he’s here… it’s wild. 

After 15 min or so everyone was organized, we got in our vehicles. Caleb, bless him… Most guys with new babies are always so awkward hahah they never seem to know how to hold them or what to do with their tiny little bodies and Caleb just powered through. Never skipping a beat, remaining so calm and strong for his family, he took little Ziggy inside. Courtney was waiting for them her bleeding had stopped and Ziggy was ready to eat! Meanwhile myself and Krystal and infant got to hang out with her son in the parking lot and go for walks and look a trucks while we waited for Caleb to come back. At 2 am I hit the road and got home at 3:30 am. Tired. But so happy. 

Birth is fucking amazing you guys… fucking amazing. 


But it had been years since I had seen them all together and only my second time meeting Connor. Who holds the record for the most tears cried by a groom haha. Which I LOVE, takes a real man to be vulnerable and I can tell Connor will be a wonderful partner to Ashley. 

Wish you two all the best for this wild future. 

xx


FILM Session

November 25, 2020

WOMEN & THEIR BODY HAIR

Tonight is Pisces full moon. 
Full moons are peak periods. In February we had a NEW moon in Pisces. Think about what intentions you were setting for yourself then. Now look at how far you’ve come since! 

You want to speed it up and slow it down. You want them to be grown ups and babies at the same time. The things that drive you insane are the things you know you’ll miss the most. You want a break but you miss them on the break. You want to cry because you are so broken, but you want to happy cry because you’re so whole. you lose yourself and find yourself almost every day. You have no idea what you’re doing, but you know you’re doing exactly what you’re supposed to be doing. It’s just the way it is. So cheers to all the mums in all the phases, with all the feelings. You’re not alone.

-catandnat
There are places in the heart you don’t even know exist until you love a child.
-Anne Lamott
A day and a shoot they will cherish forever.

Not long after they experienced a miscarriage. I can only image the pain they have been feeling over these last couple weeks. They have been trying so hard to start a family. But this is unfortunately a common story and I have full faith they will be blessed again.

Keep your chins up. You two are going to be the most incredible parents when it’s meant to happen. I love you both deeply. Sending all my love and light.
My favourites are the last ones when the girls had a pretend wedding for them.

MOTHERHOOD SESSION

NOV 21, 2020

FULL MOON IN PISCES

We went to high-school and photography school together. She was my roommate in college, then she went to Nelson and became a Potter. She is one hell of a creative and one of the kindest, most genuine people I know. I am so grateful for our friendship and cannot wait to have more of her pieces in my home! @danicaceramica ~ give her a follow.
Reflecting back on that, I realize it was a way for me to try and hide in my own skin. Covering up my body so I could fade into a darkness where no one could hurt me. Since then, I haven't started shaving, but now I do it for different reasons.

I have decided that I want to have complete ownership of my body. Before anyone else. I gave up wearing make-up and eventually stopped wearing bras too. I wanted my body to be as raw and natural as I could get it. I wanted to own who I was, before society constructed what I should be, and fall in love with my physical state. 

I don’t always love my body hair, in fact some days I secretly think I’d look better without out. Or at least hotter. But I guess that’s why I’m so determined not to shave. I want to get to the point where I do feel sexy—all the time. Strutting my stuff with all my glorious body hair. I am fiercely determined to love myself and my body. To claim it as my own, not anyone else's.

-Makenzie (@minalminwaji)

I am still in shock over how it all came to be. Back in Feb, Courtney contacted me saying she just found out she was pregnant and wanted to see if I was available for maternity and birth photos. With my wild schedule things don’t always line up but when they do it’s like the stars and the moon work together.

Yesterday morning I was sitting in Kelowna starring out my window looking at the giant snowflakes fall dreading what the highway was going to be like. As I left my driveway my wiper blade stopped working. Two hours later after everyone telling me to not go, to stay, get it fixed on Monday I was back on the road. With a wrench in my console incase I had an issue on the road. I was determined to get to the Island. I wasn’t in a rush I just felt like I NEEDED to be there. I made it across the highway in thick fog, did my session in Van, my ferry was canceled and then not canceled… I was on the 5:45. While I was sitting on the ferry I realized I hadn’t heard back from Courtney. I also though about how strong my cramps were today. Usually having a lite period today was extra odd. My period was heavy and my cramps were strong. My mind on my uterus most of the day. That’s when I though to myself… I wonder if Courtney is in labour?

45 min out of Naniamo I got a text. “I think I’m in labour, the midwife is coming at 8pm to check me.” 5 minutes from the turn off to her house she txt me again “ I’m 4 cm.” Within 30 min I was at her house and in 2.5 hours Ziggy was born. 

Her labour was fast and furious. She nearly had him on the toilet trying not to push while the other midwife rushed to join. She birthed him in the tub but he was almost to big to fit, struggling with the shoulders the midwife had to manually assist. A full 10 lbs! Courtney was so kind throughout her labour. Her love so strong from her partner. Always a please, always a thank you even if it got cut off for a contraction. 

I think this is my favourite part about birth… watching the couple. It’s always such an honour to be part of someones birth. Being in that sacred space, with dimmed lights, moans and cries. Every touch means something. Every little kiss, every word of encouragement. It’s when I see couples real love… I see the want in their partners eyes to be able to take the hurt away. I see the strength they have in each other. It’s beautiful and so fucking real. 

After getting to the bed and things going so smoothly, Courtney began to loose a lot of blood. The paramedics were called and she was carried away on a stretcher to the hospital. Her son who had been sleeping woke up from all the comotion and Caleb quickly and calmly comforted him and distracted him with trucks and a show. Not wanting him to see the mess or his new little brother yet. Not without Mom. Courtney’s friend Krystal who was there for support ( and fucking rad support she gave) was tending to her own infant so I got to hold little Ziggy. 

So fresh, brand new… His first couple hours of life outside his mother and I was holding him… I don’t usually get to snuggle my clients babies when they are so fresh and if I do it’s not for very long. So I swaddled him in a blanket and found a rocking chair in the corner of his brothers room and we looked at each other. I got to feel his soft fresh skin, listen to his perfect little sounds. Watch his eyes open and close as he tried to put the world in focus. I sat there holding him in awe of his perfection. A tear slipped down my cheek, sad for his mother who wasn’t getting to hold him right now. Part of me feeling guilty that I was getting this time with him and not her but knowing it was for her own safety. I don’t think having my period was helping with my emotions but births really fucking get me… Being a woman and watching what our bodies fucking create and birth! We grow humans!! He grew inside of her and now he’s here… it’s wild. 

After 15 min or so everyone was organized, we got in our vehicles. Caleb, bless him… Most guys with new babies are always so awkward hahah they never seem to know how to hold them or what to do with their tiny little bodies and Caleb just powered through. Never skipping a beat, remaining so calm and strong for his family, he took little Ziggy inside. Courtney was waiting for them her bleeding had stopped and Ziggy was ready to eat! Meanwhile myself and Krystal and infant got to hang out with her son in the parking lot and go for walks and look a trucks while we waited for Caleb to come back. At 2 am I hit the road and got home at 3:30 am. Tired. But so happy. 

Birth is fucking amazing you guys… fucking amazing. 


But it had been years since I had seen them all together and only my second time meeting Connor. Who holds the record for the most tears cried by a groom haha. Which I LOVE, takes a real man to be vulnerable and I can tell Connor will be a wonderful partner to Ashley. 

Wish you two all the best for this wild future. 

xx


FILM Session

AUGUST 23, 2020

DANICA CERAMICA

Motherhood is something I wish for every woman. To feel the power of creation and a love like no other. Growing as your own human while growing another life. 


MOTHERHOOD SESSION

AUG 24, 2020

MIKALA

sea star
mother
lover

MOTHERHOOD Session

AUGUST 23, 2020

CHILD WORSHIPPING SUN SERVING MOON DANCER

You will never have this day with your children again. Tomorrow, they will be a little older than they were today. This day is a gift. Just breathe, notice, study their faces and little feet. Pay attention. Relish the charms of the present. Enjoy today. It will be over before you know it.


MOTHERHOOD SESSION

AUG 24, 2020

OLIVER

my heart is tied to you like the ocean to the salt. 

MOTHERHOOD Session

AUGUST 20, 2020

OCEAN PAINTED MOTHER

My name is Alisha Emslie and I am a yoga teacher, a student of plants and a student of birth.

this is my period practice 

MOTHERHOOD SESSION

AUG 20, 2020

CELEBRATE YOUR BLEED

A macrame artist by trade a Mother by day. 


MOTHERHOOD Session

AUGUST 18, 2020

OCEAN PAINTED MOTHER

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